Last Updated on April 7, 2017 by Kimberly Stroh
Right now, I’m in the trenches of Motherhood and dealing with the lack of sleep that my 4 month old is causing. I can’t see an end in sight and the sleep issue is a nightly struggle. My firstborn was an awful sleeper, but I don’t remember being this exhausted the first go around. I used to nap during the day while he slept. But now that I have an infant and a toddler, naps aren’t happening. Not ironically, I just started a fierce coffee habit to help me deal with this unending tiredness.
At some point though, you start comparing your infant’s sleep patterns to the “average” baby. Last week, I asked our Pediatrician how other babies are sleeping at his age. I was desperate to know how we stacked up and if our doctor had any tips. Everyone knows that newborns don’t sleep, but at some point your infant is supposed to sleep.
I got my answer, but it wasn’t what I wanted to hear.
The Infant Sleep Struggle
I was told that most babies are sleeping through the night by 4 months. Immediately, I started to wonder what I was doing wrong. My oldest wasn’t sleeping through the night at this point either. I started to analyze our entire bedtime routine, trying to piece together a solution.
Currently, we are in a transition period. I’m transferring him to his own room and to his crib, from the bassinet next to my bed. Any progress that we made, has been thrown out the window. It’s a serious struggle. I don’t think parents realize how many changes you go through in the first year and how much it affects the baby.
There’s also a baby sleep expert at every corner of the internet. I’ve read about every method and seen all of the tricks. Moms are just desperate for sleep at this stage. The “cry it out” method isn’t for me, but I also realize I don’t want to give up nights with my Husband because I’m rocking him for hours on end. I admire Moms that have this all figured out by now. Surely, I don’t and this is round #2!
My son is also at that tricky stage where he is rolling over and can’t be swaddled anymore. This kid LOVES to be swaddled. It’s now become a safety issue and I can’t swaddle him. Yet another change to endure. I find myself glued to the baby monitor, like an addiction. I watch his every wiggle and roll.
Thinking Positively
A bonus to having an older child and going through this again with my youngest, is knowing it will get better. There will be difficult nights, but they won’t last forever. I’m staying positive and cherishing the snuggles, sweet coos and smiles. I know that soon enough, he’ll let me have the energy that I crave by letting me sleep.
In the meantime, we just burn the midnight oil together and I catch up on my social media newsfeed. I feel awful because I can’t commit to anything in the early morning hours anymore. This totally stinks, as a runner, who loves to meet other friends for a group run. When I try to make plans for something in the morning, 4am comes around and I can’t even fathom functioning in a few hours.
I know we’ll figure this out and it’ll seem like a tiny point in our lives. In the meantime, thank goodness for huge oversized sunglasses. And coffee. Lots of coffee.
Tell me! Share your infant sleep tips with me. Help a Mama out!
Jennifer Pilgrim | Mom Skills
Saturday 15th of April 2017
I am currently battling a toddler sleep struggle. It isn't as bad as the newborn struggle but baby girl does not want to sleep in her own bed or ever go to bed for that matter. Ugh!
Victoria
Friday 14th of April 2017
Every child is definitely a little bit different, I get that it is hard to get kids to sleep (my brother for example) through the teenage years though there won't be as much problems trust me :p
Caitlin
Friday 14th of April 2017
I don't know how parents of infants do it! I need an inordinate amount of sleep a night - my heart goes out to everyone running on fumes.
katrina gehman
Thursday 13th of April 2017
babies and sleeping, oh how i don't miss those days. i try and help my friends when they have questions as i have the oldest kids in my group of friends.
lydia
Thursday 13th of April 2017
Every child is different. I know it's hard to get kids sleeping through the night, although I know my parents had all of us kids sleeping through the night by 2 months.